The old fart’s top news story of the day is about poachers, the hunters who it’s time for us to hunt. I was appalled to read this morning that poachers in Kenya slaughtered a white mother giraffe and her ghostly-looking calf. The rare pair’s remains were found after not being seen several months. The Kenyan Wildlife Service says it is investigating the killings, which happened in the Ishaqbini Conservancy natural reserve area. The unusually white pair had been celebrated in Kenya since they were first discovered in 2017, sparking news coverage around the world.
Time For Open Season on Poachers
A third white giraffe was reportedly born in 2019. Mohammed Ahmednoor, the manager of Ishaqbini Hirola, said, “This is a very sad day for the community of Ijara and Kenya as a whole. We are the only community in the world who are custodians of the white giraffe.” Locals found the unusual giraffes’ bodies at the wildlife sanctuary that the animals called home, according to a news release from the Hirola Conservation Program, who tweeted, “We mourn the loss of Kenya’s rare white giraffes. This is a dark day not only to the conservation community, but also to all the Kenyans who took pride in the existence of this unique species.”
The World Has Lost Precious Biological Treasures
The adult giraffe was the only known female of her color, according to the park. Coloring aside, she was one of only about 11,000 reticulated giraffes left in the world. The endangered species has been in sharp decline in recent decades, and only one young white reticulated giraffe bull is now believed to be alive today. The herds of 20 to 30 animals that were recorded in the late 19th and 20th centuries, have been reduced to an average herd size of fewer than six individuals today.
We Lost 40% Of Giraffes In 30 years
Now this kind of news angers me to end, and for several different reasons. First and foremost, the world has lost precious biological treasures, and it’s already lost way too many already. Next is why we’re losing them. Part of the problem is that giraffe tails are highly prized by many African cultures, and are used in good-luck bracelets, fly whisks, and even thread for sewing or stringing beads. Another part of the problem is that humans hunt giraffes because they’re easily killed. They’re easy to spot, slow to get away, and curious by nature, so they’re slaughtered for their hides, meat, and body parts. And the death rate is so high that we’ve lost lost 40% of the world’s tallest land animal’s population in just 30 years, with no sign of the rate of loss slowing down.
Wildlife Trading Is A Major Black Market
Recent reports reveal poaching and wildlife trafficking are contributing heavily to the decline. Now poaching has been defined as the illegal hunting or capturing of wild animals, once associated with land use rights. Poaching was once primarily performed by the starving for subsistence purposes on lands reserved or owned by nobility and territorial rulers. Today poachers kill or capture animals to sell them locally, or for the global trade in wildlife. Wildlife trading is a major black market that has increased alongside rising wealth in Asia – a major consumer of wildlife – and the advent of e-commerce and social media websites. Some animals, such as birds, reptiles, and primates, are captured live so that they can be kept or sold as exotic pets.
Wild Plant Species Now Being Poached
Slaughtered animals, on the other hand, have commercial value as food, jewelry, decor, or traditional medicine. The ivory tusks of African elephants, for example, are carved into trinkets or display pieces. The scales of pangolins, small animals that eat ants, are ground into powder and consumed for their purported healing powers. The meat of apes, snakes, and other bush animals is considered a delicacy in parts of Africa. Rhinoceros horn is currently the most valuable commodity in the world, selling on the black market for $70,000 per kilogram or more. In addition to killing for direct profit, poachers target animals to prevent them from destroying crops or attacking livestock. This happens to lions and elephants in Africa, as well as to wolves, coyotes, and other predators in North America and beyond. And sadly since the 1980s, the term “poaching” has also been used to refer to the illegal harvesting of wild plant species, which are being decimated for commercial purposes.
Fight Against Poaching Gone Commando
Poaching’s become so bad, that in central Africa the fight against poachers went commando, led by a former Israeli military trainer and his team, who are deploying battle-tested tactics to stop the runaway slaughter of elephants. And in the U.S., VETPAW is a group of veterans with combat skills who are committed to protecting and training Park Rangers to combat poaching on the ground in Africa. They employ veterans to help fight the increasing unemployment rate of this group in the U.S. but also, and most importantly, because their skills learned on the front lines is unrivaled. These highly trained service men and women lead the war against brutality, oppression, and annihilation for both human beings and the animal kingdom.
Free Running Hounds Now Hunt Poachers
And in parts of South Africa they’re now using packs of free running hounds to hunt poachers. The black and tan hounds, a unique bloodline of aggressive free-running pack dogs used in Texas by law enforcement to track down escaping prison inmates, now hunt packs for poachers. That’s all thanks to Joe Braman, a full time family man, part time cop, businessman, and cowboy, who’d never given a thought to the rhino poaching crisis in South Africa. Until May 2018, when his phone rang.
The next thing he knew, he and his free-running hounds were close to Kruger National Park, sprinting across the acacia plains chasing armed rhino poachers. According to authorities, since then he and his hounds have helped law enforcement teams in the greater Kruger region catch an unprecedented 145 poachers and confiscate 53 guns, boosting the overall rate of successful arrests and providing a new strategy to fight poaching in Africa.
See Who’s Best At Hunting
So this old fart encourages you men and women of arms to use your might in the fight against poachers, and especially against those who financially motivate people to poach. Put your hunting skills to the test and see who’s best at hunting down the damn dirty pests. Just imagine being able to use your phone to show the folks at home your latest trophy, and receiving comments like, “Holy shit, will ya look at the size of the fu manchu on that one!”, “Good gawd almighty, they’ll pay me to shoot assholes? Where the hell do I sign up?”, and “Ain’t nothin’s quite as satisfying as a good day’s huntin’!”
Keep Your Eye Out And Ear Open Near Home
There’s a good world out there that needs a world of good, and a good deal of good people to make it happen. But you don’t need to cross the globe to help. Nor do you need to confront poachers to put an end to their shenanigans. There’s poachers of all kinds almost everywhere, so keep your eye out and ear open near home, and use your phone to capture video and audio evidence, record license plate numbers, and report them. Poaching for trophy and financial gain needs to end, and it needs to end now.
Poacher Hunting On Reality TV
So, please forgive this grumpy old fart for hoping someday to see poacher hunting become a reality TV show, but just think of the enormous number of commercial possibilities. Why, the auditions would be packed, gun manufacturers would have the show’s phone ringing the off the hook, you’d never be able to have enough official “Poacher Hunter” t-shirts and hoodies in stock, live action figures and gun powder aerosol spray would be flying off the shelf, and who knows what medical marvels could be accomplished with ground testicle?
The show could flit from country to country each episode, showing the latest and greatest hunts live, and fan websites would pop up like digital dandelions. Yep, I reckon if there’s any money to be made by poaching, let it be from hunting poachers. Now I ain’t talking about a redneck taking a deer out of season the feed his family kind of poaching, but the kind that starts in a small medicinal shop in Asia and results in a black bear in British Columbia being gutted for a gall bladder, a rhinoceros killed for its horn, and elephants for their tusks. I’m talking about the black market poachers, who in my opinion need to become trophies for other kinds of hunters, and the sooner, the better.
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